Month: August 2006 (Page 1 of 2)

What a Wednesday. Great stories abound from the world of football–at least the part of the world that is England.

What soap opera writer is penning the Sunderland script? Whoever it is, a hearty thank you. Just when you think it can’t get any crazier, a completely novel twist comes flying out of nowhere. The latest installment is sure to supply interesting storylines for months. Or until the murder (probably set for Christmas to boost the ratings). Niall Quinn’s big-name coach has turned out to be none other than one Roy Keane. Put aside the fact that they reputedly hated one another while playing for Ireland, Keano is simply a lunatic. Hard as nails and about as clever. This is going to be brilliant.

If you’re unfamiliar with the profundity of Roy Keane, or just want a quick laugh, football365 has helpfully compiled a list of some of his deeper insights.

In apparent emulation of Mr. Keane, ManCiteh’s Ben Thatcher tried to remove the head of Pedro Mendes with a brutal elbow in the match against Pompey. It was as cheap of a shot as I can remember seeing, but somehow was only worth a yellow from the ref. It might have been some sort of cruel karmic fate, giving a Portuguese player an actual real reason to dive to the turf for all their disgusting play-acting in Germany. In any case, Thatcher needs to go. English football is rough, but that’s uncalled for.

Finally, a double shot of happy news from the Chelsea camp. First, the shocking loss to lowly Middlesbrough made the day for billions around the world. There was much laughing and partying in the streets–you probably missed all that revelry while you were at work. It’s not going to be so easy this time around for the Real of the North. I suspect Ashley Cole will now be bought for the ransom Arsenal is demanding. If I were them, the ransom would have just doubled. Chelsea will pay it–whatever it is. The millionaires are too good to bother playing defense, so something must be done. The only answer for that team is to throw more Roman money at the problems. I hope Abramovich is having a good time. I suspect he’ll be getting tired of this expensive toy soon, and Chelsea will revert back to their inocuous selves. What a day that’ll be.

Then, just as hoped, they managed to draw Barcelona in the group stage of the Champions League. They’re clearly not living right at Stamford Bridge.

The Premiership season is only days old, but all of a sudden the world is wall to wall football. Finally. Thankfully.

Two matches featuring new sides are on tap for today. I will not watch Tottenham play Sheffield United tonight. Promise. Call the bookies now and throw the money at Spurs. They will win today. They really are much better than that first match. That was my fault.

I will watch West Ham and Watford instead. Watford are going to struggle for any points at all this season. An absolute sure bet for relegation. West Ham have managed to do things the right way. Despite the financial knock when they went down, and actually needing a bit of good fortune to win promotion when they did, they have built up a solid team again. On an aside worth mentioning concerning West Ham, I recently watched the movie ‘Green Street Hooligans’. It’s not much in the way of a football movie, but warrants a look if only to give the uninitiated a look at the firm culture that once abounded in England.

Lovely Ipswich will surely notch a win today. Unfortunately, it’s in the Carling Cup against lowly Peterborough instead of league competition, so it’s not going to move them out of the drop zone. Still, at this point, I’ll take anything.

Desperate Manchester United are just about to get slapped for topping-up with the whole Owen Hargreaves situation. Bayern Munich says he’s not for sale, and that’s that. Stirring that mess, trying to steal the newly popular Hargreaves isn’t going to be helpful. That, and a loss or two, could start the troubles at Old Trafford.

As an added treat, the second leg of some Champions League qualifiers take place today as well. The disreputable AC Milan will officially get back into the competition proper after tonight. Also, suddenly financially stretched, Liverpool are in Kiev to face Maccabi Haifa. The Ukraine deemed a much safer place to host the match than Israel, despite the cease-fire that has already been going on for many, many, many hours now. A loss by ‘Pool will bring about some worry for the one side that can challenge Chelsea back at home–and their form has been decidely hit or miss so far. No time for a slip.

While I’m grateful for the return of the league, it was one of those weeks where almost every result was a poke to the heart.

Man United barely looked bothered and showed absolutely no problems up front after sticking 5 (well 6, actually) into the net against a hapless Fulham. Good-bye Chris Coleman, it was nice knowing ye. Even Christiano and Wayne seemed delighted to be playing in the same sandbox. It was so bad, Rio Ferdinand felt obliged to knock one in for the visitors in an apparent attempt to keep the Cottagers hopes up enough to stay on the pitch until the final whistle.

Chelsea looked all-world against a struggling Man City, thrashing them 3-0. This is the sort of match Roman’s millionaires would have slept through and won 1-0 last year. I’m praying they get bored quickly and go back to that tactic. I won’t be able to stand seeing them playing up to their sizable abilities. It’ll make for a long season.

I was so over-confident that I broke my promise and watched the Tottenham match. As could be expected, they looked horrible and went down to Bolton 2-0. So the curse remains intact. They are incapable of winning any match I see. Big Sam looks to be just ticking off the days until he can find a decent way to exit a Bolton side he has strengthened into a solid Premierhip team, but they’re just not capapble of rising to the next level. Sooner or later, it all comes down to money. Allardyce has done the best with what he was given.

One of my other favorite teams, Charlton, looked absolutely awful. Their relegation battle began Saturday, and they’ll be in that battle all year.

Liverpool were given a very dodgy penalty late in the match to rescue a point from lowly Sheffield United. That was 2 points dropped. They can’t draw with minnows and have a prayer of challenging for the title. Week One or not. Those were important points left on the pitch.

Arsenal also dropped 2 as Randy Lerner’s (or soon to be) Aston Villa nearly stole the opening match in the Gunner’s sparkling new stadium. Martin O’Neill will be enough to keep Villa in the middle of the pack. If Lerner can add some quality, they’ll rise from the ashes and surprise many teams this season.

In the believe it or not catagory, new boys Reading came back after going down 2-0 to beat Boro 3-2. That match was just a pleasure to watch. Reading’s only mode is full forward and attack. They won’t be able to hold a lead and don’t bother trying. They just continue to try to add to one. That’ll result in some lopsided losses against the better teams, but more power to them. I’d be happy to watch them play every week.

In the Coca Cola Championship match that matterd, the glorious Ipswich Town finally earned point number one in four attempts after a snooze 0-0 match against Hull. Mid-table obscurity and safety look to be completely out of reach for now.

On a scale of 1 to 10, this week’s results have been off the scale for me, personally. Wouldn’t have been good to get my hopes up early anyway. I hate when I do that–at least I think I would.

After a dismal stretch after the World Cup, the Premier League finally kicks-off Saturday. Time for football to move back into its rightful place in the list of priorities. While I’m thinking of lists, it seems to be a good time to think about some hopes and expectations for the upcoming season.

Chelski will struggle to gel despite the roster of superstars and they’ll get pipped for the title, shocking the world, and sending Abramovich scurrying back to the bank for even more fodder to stuff an already overstuffed squad. They’ll be distracted running for the one bit of silverware they’re lacking, the Champions League. They won’t be having that either, and joy and happiness will reign throughout the land.

So, somebody has to win the title out of the rest of the usual suspects. It can really only be one club. Liverpool are coming together as a team and strengthened the side even further in the off season. They’re strong everywhere except for up front. They’ve just added Dirk Kuyt, but I can see him being a bust in England. Crouch remains more of a freak show than a big-time striker. All that said, I still think they’ll somehow find the net often enough to give the most storied team in England its first Premiership title.

Tottenham can sneak into the third spot, but the pack of 5 or 6 teams should be fairly tight in spots 3 through 8. I love Martin Jol. Of the quality teams near the top of the table, Spurs were one of the very few teams that actually improved their lot over the summer. They generally find ways to shoot themselves in the foot, but I think Tony Soprono, I mean Jol, will have them gunning at the others for a change.

Arsenal are bleeding quality players at the moment. Fortunately for them they can afford to bleed some. Other than managing to hold on to Thierry Henry, nothing positive has happened for the Gunners. The new stadium won’t be a help, at least not in the standings. They’ll be near the top all year, but won’t ever pose a serious threat.

I really don’t think Manchester United are going to be in as much trouble as many seem to fear. It’s just that for one of the first times in eons, they aren’t real threats for the title. A lot depends on their start. If they start poorly, it could be a disasterous year. The Glazers could be run out of town. Sir Alex could finally be sacked. Ronaldo and Roonaldo could kill each other. Well, Christiano will just pretend to be dying. It could all end in tears for the most famous club in the world. But probably not. They’ll be okay, but even that’s unacceptable in Manchester.

For the stragglers at the other end of the table, Watford is headed right back down. They haven’t a prayer. Wigan will find it much tougher going this year. Fulham have problems and Coleman could be the next coach looking for work. Randy Lerner has rescued an abyssmal Aston Villa and he and Martin O’Neill will keep them up somehow. ‘Arry Redknapp will find a way to keep Portsmouth going. Despite now having the most colorful manager in the league, Sheffield United will probably be back playing Ipswich next year. Reading shocked with the ease with which they won the Coca Cola Championship last year–it won’t be so easy now. They’ll stick for another year, though.

The rest will be mired in so-called mid-table obscurity. Good enough to draw against one another, beat the minnows, and get thrashed by the big clubs. I look for Newcastle to plummet. Charlton to struggle at the end as usual, and not start much better. Sam Allerdyce will want out of Bolton very soon. Going the other way, Psycho will have Manchester City continuing to improve.

I’m looking forward to a great year. Even if Chelsea does the expected and wins the title by September, the rest of the league seems to be tightening up. It’s still the best league going, and I can’t wait for it to start.